A fourteen-year-old girl once went to her mother and enquired about a book that her friend was reading secretly from her parents. On hearing the name, the mother said,” Girl that is an adult romance novel.” “Is it bad to read those novels?” was the immediate question. The mother thoughtfully replied,” No, it is not bad.” To test her mother the teen asked, “Can I read those books.” Though half-heartedly the mother said,” Yes, you can however it is not the right age for you to read these books. Also, remember all that you will read is not true and if you read too much it takes you away from reality.” “I don’t want to read if it is not real,” replied the teen.  

If the mother had said no, I believe the teen would have rebelled and done exactly like what her friend was doing. The mother’s affirmation with words of caution was a sign to the teen that her mother trusted her with the freedom given and she did exactly what was in her mother’s heart. 

 

Trust is the foundation of any healthy relationship that leads one to obey effortlessly.

We have always believed that the fall of mankind was because of Adam’s disobedience. But look closely disobedience was just a symptom of something deeper. Adam didn’t trust God. By forbiddance, God set the grounds for Adam to trust Him and fully depend on Him. Also, God did not reject him for his disobedience instead Adam rejected God. Adam didn’t trust God to have a way out of the mess. Adam cut himself from the source of LIFE. 

 

We are just not designed to deal with life’s issues all by ourselves. We are designed to be co-heirs with Christ (Rom 8:17), taking on what life has for us together with Christ, who promises to give us according to His riches in glory. (Philp 4:19)  Therefore, Father God desires that we, His children trust Him wholeheartedly. 

So does this mean that God doesn’t value obedience? Not at all! 

It is impossible to trust God and not obey Him. Yes, obedience follows trust, and that is when obedience doesn’t become a burden or an obligation. That is when our actions, decisions, and way of dealing with others are all rooted in love for Christ. 

 

Our relationship with Christ is a model for us to deal with our teens. As we confidently grow in totally relying on God in our life we show trust in our family members equally and this trust strengthens each relationship. 

 

The initial years of childhood are the years when we have to help children recognize wrongdoings (sin), and things that are not good for them. And through these years fixative instruction that demands obedience is necessary because children are not developed enough to make choices. However, as they grow and enter into their teens we have to slowly, gently, and in love release the dictate over them as a way to help them deal with life on their own. And this step requires trust. 

 

We have got to trust our teens!