If you haven’t read Part 1 of the post series which is about how when we trust our teens they find it easier to obey, you can CLICK HERE

Teens will reciprocate with trust when we trust them

His master said to him, ‘Well done, good and faithful servant. You have been faithful and trustworthy over a little, I will put you in charge of many things; share in the joy of your master.’ – Matthew 25:23 

In this parable, Jesus Christ is depicting the Father’s heart. It clearly reveals when we trust in God with our life He will bless us, not only that but we also share in His joy. How amazing is this, when we trust God wholeheartedly God responds to us with His trust in us.

This is the way even we as human beings respond to anyone who trusts us. When we assure trust in our teens they get confident, feel loved, and accepted. Teens easily open up and share their life with the person whom they trust. What better than having our teens come to us parents with their struggles, plans, ideas, etc.? Teens get an assurance whether good times or bad times they have their parents to fall back on.

When the relationship is sealed with trust teens obey. They readily listen and do according to what is said. There could be times that they will not agree and will be disappointed but if there is the trust they will do their best not to break your trust.

Your wholehearted trust in God leads you to consciously be obedient to Him and this lifestyle is passed on to your children. They learn to effortlessly obey God not as an obligation but because they love God and trust Him in all their ways.

Here are 4 ways you can build trust with your teen

1. Give them opportunities to take decisions independently

As easy as it looks this is the most difficult part – let go of our teens! And this is out of pure concern and love for them. However, trusting God with your teens and releasing the reigns slowly and wisely is the best thing to strengthen this relationship. Beware of being misled by the ways of the world and keeping to the trends. Remember they are learning to take decisions and we are to guide them wisely.

2. Ask open-ended questions

Open-ended questions allow the teen to give their views and express their feelings. By doing so you build a platform to start a conversation and also assure the teen that you are interested in their view. This helps you to guide them slowly to the right path. Also, they get to know that there is a space where they can share when they are ready.

3. Be specific when you encourage

When you have these open dialogues with your teens their trust grows in you and it gets stronger when you point out certain things in that conversation that you felt something about or an experience that even you go through at times. Validate their emotions and let them know how even you experience them in certain situations. This makes them secure and not victimized. Appreciate them for sharing with you their thoughts or struggle and encourage them to talk about their plans and feelings.

4. In good times or bad times be on their side

 Finally, let us remind ourselves there is nothing as perfect obedience, our teens do make mistakes and fall into trouble. Their wrong decisions may mess up things and that is when they are more likely to come to us for solutions.  In such times we should be on their side, this doesn’t mean we support their wrongdoing but we stand by them in cleaning the mess. This assures teens that no matter what the situation parents will be there for them. 

In everything that we do, we should do our best to reveal God’s unconditional love and secure a strong foundation in our relationship with our teens. As you do this, you will find them obeying God and you effortlessly, and you and your family will be a stunning advertisement for the gospel.

Like Apostle Paul, I pray …
“That your love may abound more and more [displaying itself in greater depth] in real knowledge and in practical insight, so that you may learn to recognize and treasure what is excellent [identifying the best, and distinguishing moral differences], and that you may be pure and blameless until the day of Christ [actually living lives that lead others away from sin]; filled with the fruit of righteousness which comes through Jesus Christ, to the glory and praise of God [so that His glory may be both revealed and recognized].” – Philippians 1: 9 -11